Life So Shallow

Christmas 2011 is here and gone.

I have just experienced my last Christmas as an American "Teen".

Time flies.

I've written a few posts about this kind of super-pre-midlife crisis type of moment, but I write this one with a little more circumstantial weight behind it. I think I'm at the point now where I'm realizing that I either start growing up now, or I remain a little boy until further notice. I'm seeing that such a step takes a lot of courage, and the ability to be ok with myself in the midst of situations that have not (and may never) ameliorate themselves are decisions that grownups have to make, and have to do it all the time.

I'm also at the place where with much more honesty I can see godly men and women to whom I look up live their daily walks of faith. As is the case with many, I see such a discrepancy between them and me and am prompted to think, "What must I do to get to the place that they are in their love for Jesus?" I feel stuck. But God is shining the flashlight of truth on new walls I have constructed that I didn't know existed that hinder me from moving forwards in that process of spiritual maturity. I'm being made aware of certain internal GPS units that wish to find some other way for me to mature as a young man and a lover and treasurer and Jesus and His Good News for my life.

It's strange. In some settings, I'm the "black sheep" or the "bad kid" who has always been rebellious and wanted to toe (or cross) the line in life. In other settings, I'm the life-long Christian who has always kept his nose clean, never having committed any of the "big" sins that so mark the lives of many unbelievers.

I praise God that He saved me from a life of drugs, sex, and alcohol; but just because I don't have any kids out of wedlock or have not developed an addiction for some illegal substance DOES NOT mean that I haven't lived or wallowed in a life of sin, and it also does not mean that I have lived a life of joy and fulfillment.

This thought struck me today. I was basically born a Christian. My dad has been a nice church music minister for almost as long as I can remember. My family has spent almost all our free time with other nice pastor families or nice church leader families of some kind. I played music for my nice junior high youth group and have led worship for the last few years as often as I can. I was homeschooled, went to nice Christian homeschool group, and played sports at/was affiliated with a nice Christian school for most of grade school. After high school I went right on to and now attend a nice Bible College.
I've most always listened to nice Christian music, read nice Christian books, heard nice Christian radio shows, my friends are almost all nice Christians, I know almost every major Bible story in the Bible and could beat a good majority of people in sword drills (my claim to fame as a youngster). Problem is, God doesn't care about nice. He cares about perfect. And who was perfect? Jesus. That's why "nice" doesn't (ultimately) matter.

Is that what it's like to be a good Christian? It shouldn't be. It can't be. I hope with all of my being that it isn't. If it is, this life is a cruel disappointment of cosmic proportions. Of all the things that I just listed, almost all of them could top the resumé of most Mormons and Jehovah's Witnesses and Catholics. I don't want that kind of superficial ostensibly satisfying version of existence.

It's so shallow. There's nothing there.

How pointless it is. Live a good moral life to become a pastor of a church of, if you're lucky, a couple hundred people, marry a cute girl, have some nice kids, weather a few storms of life, but in the end, have a pretty good go of it. What a miserable waste. Are any of those things that I just mentioned bad? No they aren't! I'd love all of those things. But if that's as far as it goes, just think about it- what a nice waste.

Today (Christmas Sunday) in our weekly assembly of believers, I saw a group of people that love Jesus and want to proclaim His supremacy to all who will hear. They're Souled Out.

The thing that strikes me most about these people is that they feel the Christian life so deeply. They have a lot of problems. The only difference between me and them is that they experience the love of God in a way that makes them really enjoy life. There is a richness and a robust vibrance that can only be identified by those who have experienced it. I have had short seasons where life is a true joy and I love people and feel truth in my inward parts. But right now, and for the last few months, I'm having a harder time with it.

There's got to be more to life than just some clean, well-oiled machine of what we know as a nice brand of Cultural Christianity. That branch of Christianity must leave and never return. It's time for people that really find joy and celebration in the person and work of Jesus to step out in faith and (Scripturally) put God to the test.

Pray for strangely powerful things to happen. Pray for God to bring you through situations that secure your love to Him all the more firmly. Pray that he expose latent sin in your life that you never knew was there. Ask Him to do more for you or your friends than: "Be with him/her today, bless their day and their ministry." If that is the extent of your prayer life, it makes sense to me why so many people are so dissatisfied with the whole idea of prayer.

There is a dire need for men and women that don't become content with nice moralism and an attractive smile. If that's all there is, I have one thing to say:

We're missing out on so much more.

.DSN.

Is Life Easy, or is Life Hard?

Wow. I've completed half of my undergraduate Bible School career. I'm almost a grown up. I don't know what to think yet.

It's such a clear night. I'm not one for overly descriptive adjectives, but this is one of those nights where there is such clarity in the coolness of the wind that is calmly passing through the screen on my window that I am hereby prodded to write.

The slow but steady breeze coming through my window that accompanies the typical sounds any Metropolitan area would have at 11PM coupled with The Glorious Unseen for some reason makes me want to reflect.

To answer the question posted in the title, I don't know. A little while ago, I asked God to show me my sin because I was in such a high spiritual time about 2.5 months ago that life didn't seem real. Boy did God decide to answer that prayer. My response to certain relationships, my interacting with certain musical opportunities (or lack thereof), and a healthy dose of perspective combined to give me such an eventful 2.5 months that I think I'm starting to get the picture.

Life is hard.

I'm never going to stop struggling with sin. I'm never going to stop struggling with relationships. I'm never going to stop struggling with how to approach ministry/recreational activities. And I'm certainly never going to have a truly holistic perspective on how life should be approached.. ever

I was forced to have the hardest conversation in my life this semester. I've soured more than one relationship this semester. I've thrown away golden opportunities this semester. I've really begun to see what I'm not good at this semester. And oh yeah, I got hit by a van. Life is not in my control. It's hard.

But on the other hand, life is so easy.

I believe in predestination. Yes. I said it. Paul said it too. Of the reasons why I say that life is easy, that has to be in the top three. In one sense, God did not want any of that stuff to happen. His heart aches when my heart aches. God loves me intensely. But if that were only true, then I have a nice, benevolent, and incredibly weak God that can't stop bad things from happening. Problem is, God's purpose isn't to make my life happy. God is about getting His people to love and proclaim His betterness more. While God hurts with me when I have to have incredibly uncomfortable and painful conversations, there is a very real and incredibly meaningful sense in which God did want those things to happen. He did want me to get hit by a van. "Why would God want that?", you might ask. Easy. I can say that because of the last 2.5 months, I love and treasure Jesus more than I did before. Is it a lot more than before? No, probably not a lot more. But my heart has been tenderized just that little bit. And God wanted it.

If God wants it, and He is God, then why would I want anything else? I don't know more and I certainly don't know better than he does.

That's why life is easy. He's directing my steps. They may be steps that in my sin I stumble and look away from the prize, but if I in the end love God more afterwards than before, that's what matters. If God is for us, who can possibly be against us?

.DSN.

Be Careful- They May Be Hurting

Two of some of the most helpful words given in admonishment by a close friend when on the brink of gross insensitive foolishness: be careful. There's so much to say on the subject of pain and suffering, so barring the return of Christ, there will be more.

However, I'll start by saying that in these very hectic last two-and-a-half months, one of the crazy valuable lessons I've learned is that looks are deceiving. The fact that someone carries him or herself with an air of confidence and strength by no means is an indicator of whether or not they are actually confident and strong. Masks are (can be) easy. Discernment is hard.

I have spent the last hour reading articles and entries that have made me realize how unloving, tactless, selfish, and insensitive I am in so many areas to so many different people. I tend to assume that when I'm having a bad day, everyone else around me is in a place to be able to properly deal with my struggles. When I'm having a great day, I assume that everyone else is in a place to process my humor and casual off-handed remarks and the proper judgment to not take them seriously. How ignorant and foolish am I.

I BEG you, learn from my failures! Please ask Jesus to make you aware of struggles and brokenness of the people in your life. Tonight as I write this (I am posting this article at a later time) my mind has been significantly altered by conversations/blog posts that have driven home this reality: People hurt.

It is not uncommon to find men, women, boys, or girls that have had profoundly negative circumstances thrust upon them, forcing them to either turn their eyes in on themselves, or to lift their eyes to the cross and the greatness of God. Those that respond by turning their eyes upward apprehend life with a certain lucidity that I lack and find fantastically precious and immensely valuable.

But who am I to give advice to those who have walked through times of literal trauma and survived psychologically altering circumstances? I've been a kind of rebellious child, but for the most part I'm just your typical Bible Church-Christian College-Pastor's Kid-Choir Boy who's biggest struggle in life was making idols out of sports, music, and girls. That's it. However, I have the Holy Spirit, and that counts for something. I'm nothing, but He's everything. As I get older, I begin to feel the weighty onus in and on my spirit to point people to a bigger view of the majesty and love of Jesus; especially to those who are hurting.

For any who are reading this that have been negatively affected my callous attitude or inappropriate sayings/jokes in your times of pain and stress (or anytime for that matter), I am very sorry! PLEASE forgive and pray for me. I want the Spirit of God to transform my heart into one that overflows compassion for the broken and readily dispenses love for the weary.

If you walk away from this post getting nothing else, please get this: You never know what is going on in someone's heart or the things that they are dealing with. Ask God make you love well. Next time you say something sarcastic or hurtful as a joke, think twice before you let the words escape your mouth.

.DSN.

'How To' 1.0: Return to Your First Love

"I want to see You now, like when I saw you for the first time. I want to hold Your hand, I want to feel You holding mine" - Heavens To Betsy

How often have we heard sermons/camp sessions/seminars/devotionals on how we should live with the passion and fervor of a new believer? I hear them all the time. To my chagrin, not a a single time have I ever heard a message on how to go about doing that. It's especially tough for me, because I've grown up seeing some version of Christianity around me since I was a tiny baby. God did not save me until I was about 16, so I can see a clear difference in my life as someone who hated God and his Word to someone who enjoyed the Word and did not (as frequently) scorn rebukes. The really difficult part is reckoning back to a time when I felt newly invigorated to love and share the Gospel. I see myself and many other professing believers quite clearly in John's epistolary addition in Revelation to the Ephesians (Revelation 2:3-4):

"...I know you are enduring patiently and bearing up for my name's sake, and you have not grown weary. But I have this against you, that you have abandoned the love you had at first."

I want to have that love. I'm not totally sure what it looks like, but it probably doesn't look like your typical know-it-all Bible school student *ahem*. Having never heard the solution but only hearing about my problem of lukewarm Christianity, I don't know how to go about enacting change in my life. These topics make for good devotionals but end in a hopeless cession of any and all hope for change because it's just. too. hard.

Is it too hard for me to force myself to love God? YES. God is the only one that can break my heart up that has been hardened in sin and make it soft and tender again. But is it impossible to love God? By no means! For God, all things are possible. When we see that we are gliding, slipping, or even stumbling through life, it is Imperative that we beg Him to do what He needs to do to change our hearts so that we might see Him in a new way. It may mean that God exposes some dark sins, it may mean that He will lead us through deep waters, or it may mean that He will simply break us with His love. Whatever it is, He is the only one that can turn our hearts around.

We need seek to go deeper into the Good News by which we are now being saved (1 Corinthians 15). That is one clear way to be restored to the joy of our salvation. When we realize, like when we were first saved, that we the state of hearts is one of desperate wickedness in need of a Savior, only then can we love Jesus in the way that we were made to love. Just because we are believers does not mean that we have been extricated from our body of death. Our hearts are still deceitful. Anyone who struggles with sin on a daily basis should not have a hard time comprehending this idea. When we begin to wrap our minds around the miracle of salvation and feel His cleansing blood again, our hearts automatically turn to Him and we will desire to drink as much water from the fountain as our bodies can hold.

I heard a guy say the other day that nobody does laundry like Jesus. He takes our clothes that are blackened from all kinds of dirt/grime/grease/and all things nasty, He soaks them in blood that is an intense hue of red, and they are finished. WHITE. Whiter than snow.

The farther that thought penetrates the core of our hearts, the more fervor with which we will love our Jesus.

.DSN.

Addicted to Closure

"I'm restless. I'm restless until I rest in You, until I rest in You. I am restless. I'm restless until I rest in You, until I rest in You, Oh God!" - Audrey Assad

This last month and a half has been the most intense month in recent memory. Since I got hit by that car in October, things have not only not slowed down, but life has actually gotten way more eventful, crazy, and out of my control. That much is a sure fact. My family back home has been a shining example of unconditional love and Jesus-focused Christianity even when it doesn't seem to "work"; and talking to my parents as much as I have been has been a repose for my spirit, as God has been doing some gardening, pulling weeds, occasionally showing me uprooted plants, and transporting wheelbarrows of dirt/soil/grass/rocks/worms from one place to anoth. One of the many benefits of this process is that there is rarely a dull moment, and there's always something going on to think about! In that sense, for my way over-analytic mind, I can't complain.

As I was cleaning my room and listening to some music (Audrey Assad), I realized that I'm addicted to closure. Whether we're talking about the debacle of Summer '09, or my little thing that happened with that girl senior year of high school (insert laughter here), or most of everything that has happened in the last 3 months, I want closure. I want to hear the door shut. Whether I know that it's a benevolent "see ya", or an angry slam, I always want to experience finality so I'm certain concerning the way in which I should proceed with the highest degree of certitude. Is it idolatry? Probably. Lack of trust in the Gospel? Yep. What am I going to do about it? Great question.

That summer of '09 afforded me a conversation a mentor of mine who after hearing me bare my soul about how I just wish I knew the ending and how everything turned out on the other end of the relationship and just wanted some closure, he said quite coldly, "Dave, closure isn't in the Bible." That was not helpful at the time. It was insensitive, unempathetic, and useless... at the time. Of course closure isn't in the Bible just like predestination isn't in the Bible.. bad example. The word "Trinity" isn't in the Bible, but it's obviously real. The difference is that Trinitarian theology is all over Scripture, but the concept of closure isn't much at all. Not only is it not in the Bible, but the opposite is.

Fast forward to today about an hour ago, and his comment really hit home. Closure isn't in the Bible. Why is that? I want to be able to move on! I hate those 6 words, "I don't know what's going on." Joseph sat in a stinking prison for 3 years with a intense lack of closure, especially considering he was the victim of a pretty lousy con-job and went from high up in the public sector to the lowest of the low. However, he was so faithful in a state of lacking closure that the prison guard (I assume of a pretty big prison), didn't worry about Joseph's corner at all, and Joseph was even put in charge of people while he was a prisoner himself! Quite a highly functioning individual if you ask me. His answer was a simple one. He loved and trusted Yahweh his God. God was enough for Him. God moved Joseph to action, and he did it without question. There most likely wasn't a whole lot of dialogue going on between them. Joseph loved his God and his life was a crystalline picture of that love.

So no. Closure isn't in the Bible. Trust is. Love is. Security is. All a need for closure is is a lack of security in the perfect plan of God. In my sinful heart, I want to know that I have either totally made the right decision/said the right thing or totally made the wrong decision/said the wrong thing. If it's the right decision, I can move forward in good conscience. If it's the wrong decision, I can at least put that option out of my mind completely. The problem is when I'm in that state of limbo, not knowing if a situation/relationship/life-choice is going to work out, how do I proceed with certainty? Abraham moved out of his hometown when God told Him to pick up and leave. Noah built an ark and was seen as stark raving mad for over 100 years because he heard the voice of the Lord tell him to do something. I'm restless until I rest in Him. And no. I probably won't have all the answers. Jeepers, I probably won't have any of the answers, and I for sure don't have Noah, Abraham, or Joseph's faith. I do believe, but God must help my unbelief. I know He will. He's that good :)

He's our hope.

.DSN.

God's Still In Charge

I just picked up the book after which my college's chancellor's ministry is named: Desiring God. John Piper's insights into the purpose and proper motivation for life are absolutely mind-blowing. I can't get enough. Please read it!!!

He blows any arguments for anti-sovereignty out of the water- not just from a theologian's perspective, but from the stance that actually wants God to be completely sovereign. This can be hard to understand and grasp initially, but God being in charge of everything makes life so much sweeter!

I have a really hard time when people give God credit for all of the blessings in their lives, but when the unpleasant times roll around, God is somehow extricated from any and all claims to responsibility. We don't need to defend God from things that He never denies. For example, when a believer loses a house in a fire, many will say that God is not allowed to do that. God wants the best for us, therefore he should not be responsible for the house burning down. Here's the thing: if that person is a true child of God, will they run away from Him or will they run to Him in the midst of growing adversity? They will run to Him as fast as their little legs will carry them.

Is this a bad thing? Is this something that God does not want? ... ... ... No. No, no, no, no, no!!! This is GOOD. When we have everything that is most important to us get stripped away from us and we in turn run to Jesus, who is made to be seen as the most valuable? Jesus. You wanna talk about Gospel-centrality, here it is, from the mouth of Dr. John Piper, "No one is a Christian who does not embrace Jesus gladly as his most valued treasure, and then pursue the fullness of that joy in Christ that honors Him." Anyone who does the opposite of that on a consistent basis doesn't have a lot of ground on which they can claim sonship and fellow heirs of God the Father.

Here's my point. God is about God. "God has many goals in what He does. But none of them is more ultimate than His glory. They are all subordinate. God's overwhelming passion is to exalt the value of His glory. To that end, He seeks to display it, to oppose those who belittle it, and to vindicate it from all contempt. It is clearly the uppermost reality in His affections. He loves His glory infinitely (Piper, 43)." God is allowed to ordain all kinds of things that are other than good (evil) or even just straight up uncomfortable. "Why?" you may ask? Because God's self-centeredness means that He might decide to burn down our house, take away friends, or just pry idols right out of our hands. Whatever it takes for us to realize how only-satisfying He is are the measures He will take, for those who are truly His children.

If you are feeling like God isn't near or present, hope in God. You will again praise Him, your salvation and your God.

And yes, God has ordained what is happening. And yes, I love it. "You're crazy." Sure. I'm really crazy. Never denied it. However, I'm not crazy enough to think that God took a day off from planning my life and then came back after a commercial break and realized how hard things got all of a sudden and was then pleasantly surprised that I'm realizing how much He is the only satisfier of my soul. I'm not that crazy.

I love my God because He knows that prying my idols out of my clammy hands will make me tired enough of the struggle to realize that He's all I've got. He loves it. I love it (on occasion). It's a win-win situation.

I like thinking of God as in control rather than me being in control. It's a lot easier when He's calling the shots than when I am royally messing everything up.

God alone is my hope. I want to feel that reality-altering truth more deeply.

.DSN.

A Christmas Story (One of the many, I’m sure)

Christmastime is here. Happiness and cheer.

But really, it’s here already. We say it every year, and it never becomes less true: “Is it that time of year again?”

But enough with the pleasantries and down to business. I was sitting in church last night, and something really weird happened. I was right in the front after, incidentally, having playing in one of the most beautiful worship sets I’ve contributed to in a long time, listening to a fantastic message for the first Advent Service which carried the theme of Hope. Pastor Sam talked about what Hope is, what it isn’t, what it does, and what it looks like when Hope is gone, among other things. Click Here. (I really suggest you listen to it!) I was on the front of the left side pews which surround the stage, which gave me a clear view of both the middle and the left side aisles. About halfway through the message, I saw a girl who looked about 9 years old walk down the left aisle towards the stage, looking through every pew. Huh. She was just probably looking for her parents. She got to the front row and then turned around and skipped back towards the door. Considering my extraordinary sense of direction, I remember doing that many times as a child much older than 9. I’m sure she’ll find them. I looked back up to the stage, but out of the corner of my eye, I saw that she was coming back doing the same thing. Really strange. This time I was intrigued. Not only was I wondering who she was looking for, but would she actually find them? A third time she did the same thing! I would have been scared and then tried to play it off all cool and go to the bathroom and wait until the end of the message or something, but she didn’t do that at all. What was strange was that it didn’t seem to bother her in the least that she could not find what she was looking for. She seemed to have a strange sense of hope...

As this situation has progressed, I am wondering if I should try to help her, if I should ask if she’s ok, or just do something to help her find who she needed. Realizing that she probably was going to be ok, I stayed firmly planted in my seat, but was still riveted on her strangely joyous search for her lost parents. Having traversed the left aisle many times now and even having entered a few of them to get a better look, she walked to the middle aisle, and during the message, continuing the same kind of thing: walk up and down, and peer into each pew for confirmation that her parents either are or are not there. Finally, she turned around towards the right-middle set of pews. Immediately, she saw who she was looking for: a girl in her 20s that must have been watching her for the day. They might have hugged or something, but having watch this mini-story unfold before my eyes, I didn't notice any more details as I felt so blessed to be where I was, worshipping with the people of God, sharing in the Hope of Jesus.

How appropriate. This little girl exhibited exactly the kind of hope that the faithful Israelites had in anticipation for the Messiah- the very hope that Pastor Sam was talking about! When all Hope seemed lost and despair was immanent, she stayed her mind on the object of her search. As I found out through the message, the absence of hope will inevitably lead to despair. This girl did not despair! She had hope that she would find the person for whom she was earnestly looking, and just like at Christmas for those in anxious anticipation, she found her guardian!

Now we clearly can’t feel the agony of not having a Messiah. We have him, and just like we celebrated last week (or at least were supposed to), we are thankful for the reality that the Gospel is here and alive. Thankfulness looks back, but Hope looks forward! We must look forward to what is to come, because this world is passing away! There is no power here, Gandalf the Grey! (I had to, I'm sorry (and "Grey" is the British spelling because those actors are British... ok I'm done))

If that little girl looked forward to the event of finding her immediate treasure, we should all the more eagerly await the coming of Jesus!

When depressed, dry, broken, or struggling, Hope says, “He isn’t done. He’s coming back to make all things new.”

God is our Hope.

.DSN.

Thanksgiving

I wish I were more sensitive. When it comes to times that I need to man up, I very literally travel back in time and become a baby. However, when it’s time for me to have an empathetic and caring heart, I become selfish and cold. Nice.

Having established that previous fact, I can honestly say that I have no idea where the inspiration for this post comes from. I realize that God is the only one who should receive thanks, for from Him, to Him, and through Him. Therefore, He is the only one who deserves any ultimate glory. In the meantime, God works through broken vessels.

It’s Thanksgiving week, and I’m not going home. I have really mixed feelings about that. I’m glad to be here in the Frozen North, but I really love my family. I’ve talked to both my dad and my mom more in the last two weeks than probably most of this semester. Major blessing. I feel like God is pouring a kind of thankfulness that only He can give on my spirit right now, and because I can’t share it with anyone at home in an immediate way, I want to do it here.

Here’s the Biblical justification for the next few hundred words :)

"I rejoice at the coming of Stephanas and Fortunatus and Achaicus, because they have made up for your absence, for they refreshed my spirit as well as yours. Give recognition to such people."
(1 Corinthians 16:17-18 ESV)

I will probably forget very important people to me, but these are the people that God has put on my heart to thank personally for serving me in the last year, so if I didn’t include you, I’m sorry!

Thank you Mr. Smith for being my pastor. I see evidences of grace in your life as I was often late to our meetings and also made such preposterous statements that you just went with and even humored such superfluity at times. It also means a lot to me that you have been so willing to take time to respond to emails and blog posts and things that I realize you don’t have a ton of time for otherwise. Thank you.

Thank you Scott for being a mentor to me and listening to me ask questions that are literally impossible to answer, but doing your best to think through things with me to the best that you can. Thank you.

Thank you Jeff and Widdy for being really gracious host parents to me over the last few months. You both have been so patient and gracious with me as I mess up laundry, miss appointments, lose keys, etc. I am so grateful to God that I am here now learning from and living with you. I love doing things with your boys and I am really looking forward to the things that God has in store in the next few months. So far nothing has been really easy, but He’s been really good and having your house as God’s base of operation in my life has been a divine blessing. Thank you.

Thank you Dale for easily being my best friend pretty much all of 2nd semester freshman year. You know all the stuff I was dealing with and you cared enough about me seeing Jesus for as supremely satisfying over all things. In doing so, I believe that God used your love for me in the process in saving my soul. I love you so much bro. Thank you.

Thank you Kevin for not avoiding the uncomfortable and spending inordinate amounts of time with me, teaching me how to study the Word and spending that time in the basement working on reading the Bible like I actually believe what it’s saying. Thank you.

Thank you Ryan G. for listening to me interrupt, ask inane questions (whose answer was found in thinking about the question for about 5 more seconds), and give counsel that was just hard counsel. I think back to that conversation in your SUV sitting in the loading bay for Hope Academy having one of the more sobering conversations anyone has had with me in a long time. God used that conversation to change my life. Thank you.

Thanks Amanda G. for chillen and hanging out that day before I left for school this summer. It’s sweet to hit it off right away with people and not have to work a ton at the friendship for it happen. Thank you.

Thank you Dan Stanley for being there for me- forcing me to make that phone call, and being by my side when I was laying in the hospital bed doing my best to subvert the authority of those who instructed me to lay still. Easily two of the most traumatic experiences of the semester. I’m glad we finally became friends. I really respect you, and I’m glad that you have pushed me to do the uncomfortable for the sake of becoming a Man of character and integrity. Thank you.

Thank you Mark for being a friend to me even when the extent of our relationship consisted of you picking me up and dropping me off at different places. I’m glad we have a more amicable relationship now where we actually hang out now and do more things that friends do together. Also, thank you for letting me go on and on bout my problems and I just need to talk. You always listen. Thank you.

Thank you Kyle for being my intellectual sparring partner for the last 6 months. More than that however, I have learned more in my relationship with you in regards to the importance of “Reformed” theology as relates to the importance of Gospel-centrality. I love our talks (and disagreements) about how we se Biblical truth, but more so, I love the moments of total one-mindedness around the undying power of the Gospel and its importance in everything. I praise God that He has taught me so much through you. Thank you.

Thank you Savannah for being the friend I wish I always had! You consistently read my blog posts and respond to my really stupid tweets and text messages. I have no idea why. What will happen is I will tweet or text you something and I’ll think to myself, “I can’t believe that I just sent something again to her that should be disregarded as completely meaningless and really dumb.” But, of course, you’ll either humor my insanity, or say something that makes me thankful for people that see things more clearly than I do. Thank you!

Thank you Dan Soukup for listening to me babble on about nothing at all. It has probably been days that I have talked about frivolous foolishness, and you have actually laughed. Wow. Thank you also for listening to the actual stuff that is going on in my life and genuinely seeming to care. Whether you do or not, I have no idea (but I know you do though). It is for that that I am so grateful. I see such a spirit of patience and servant-heartedness in you that I want to emulate. I also love that when I get all hortative you and your cool mind objectively process what I have said and will frequently say things like (not specifically), "David, that was dumb. Don't say that again." If I didn't have men like you in my life, just think about the heresy I would spurt! (Gross mental picture, I know). Thank you, sir.

Thank you Dave for being in many ways the big brother I never had. Particularly in high school, but now as I think for myself, I enjoy the depths of some of our conversations, the vapidity of many jocular conversations, and the mind-stretching quality of many of our disagreements. God has used you and your life and influence to bring things about in my life that wouldn't have otherwise been made known to me. Thank you.

Thank you Paul for being one of the best listeners I've ever met. I leave nearly every conversation thinking to myself, "This guy really seems to care about me." I can never understand why, except for the fact that you are a godly and grace-filled man who puts himself last for the sake of serving others. I love hanging out and learning from your example. Thank you.

Thank you Shelly for being the big sister I never had. I’m seriously so thankful that we met when we did. I can definitely say that from the beginning our friendship has been just a little different. I can also say with a clear conscious and an honest heart that your example has taught me more about life in the last 12 months than anyone else I know. I realize that I am prone to exaggeration, but I mean that honestly. I really respect you and I respect the way that you have responded to God’s call in your life which has played itself out in very tough situations. Also, I am SO glad you’re getting married! I can’t wait to have honorary nephews and nieces running around soon! Thank you for being you :)

Thank you Joey for being my man this summer. When I needed someone to lift me up, you were there and I love you for that. It’s taken about 15 years to get to this point, but that’s ok with me. Through you, God has brought different things in my life to show me how much I need to depend on the Gospel because if I tried to depend on who I think I am, I am in serious trouble. Thanks bro.

Thank you Ryan T. for letting me lead worship with you when it has worked out. Aside from the actual worship-leading technical stuff I learn from you, I am really thankful that God is revealing Himself to you and affecting your life in a way that spills out to others. Thank you for coaching my voice; not only do I learn the things that you teach me, but I learn from the way that you teach. I am thankful for your graciousness and willingness to move as the Spirit leads. Last but not least, thank you for letting me join your small group. I’m looking forward to it so much! Thank you.

Lastly but certainly not least, tha fam.

Thank you Philip and Matthew for being so patient and gracious with me all these years. After visiting home a few weeks ago, I realized how much I really do love just chilling out and singing or just laying on the couch making jokes with yous. I’m really glad to see that you are both growing up and not letting me push you around so much anymore. Being the 3rd tallest in the family is such a fun challenge. You would probably never know what that’s like though…

Thank you Mom for many things. One of those things is signing me up for cello lessons, driving me all over tarnation for a good teacher, buying me a cello, and paying for me to fly with it across the country. Especially as I've been writing and recording more music, I've been increasingly thankful for the ability to play cello, however advanced or not advanced it is. Not that they were all bad years, but there were certainly a few seasons of less-than-optimal times; but you stuck with it, and one of the fruits of your patience is the fact that I simply love my instrument.
On a more clearly eternal note, thank you for being one of the clearer pictures of Jesus in my life as far as balancing your convictions of truth with patience and grace in your dealing with other people. I’ve been thankful to be much more connected to things that have been going on this semester by having the opportunity to talk more and listen to the things that all y’all are dealing with and working through. When I see the conflict and the lack of resolution, I thank God that He has given me such godly parents. Thank you for your example, I love you guys.

Thank you Dad for being my best friend through the “ups and downs” of these discerning times. I’m so glad to have parents that are totally sold out for Jesus and are doing whatever they possibly can to further His kingdom through living an affected life and proclamation of the wondrous power of the Gospel. I see that in a big picture way over the last 8 or so months, God has changed specifically your heart to be even more gracious and humble regarding the things that go on in life and whatnot. Even though things haven’t been terribly easy at times, I would love to do the things and be a part of the things that your (sic) doing now and I would similarly love to have the grace that God is pouring into your life. Thank you for being a man that I can imitate in the ways that you imitate Christ. Thank you.

.DSN.

Reflection on Corporate Worship (through Music)

Here is a reflection paper I just wrote for school in response to a Seminar put on at Bethlehem Baptist Church on November 11th and 12th. I submitted it to my instructor, so please forgive the slightly different writing style :) I would LOVE to talk about these things with anyone who is also thinking about these issues! Please let me know how God is working in your heart!

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The seminar put on by Bob Kauflin and John Piper concerning a theology and somewhat of a methodology of worship called “Gravity and Gladness” (from 2 Corinthians 6:10) was thought-provoking and perspective-changing. During the lecture part of the seminar, Pastor John expounded from the Scriptures concerning reasons why God needs worship, and why a robust theology of worship is not a dry subject that should be studied exclusively by pastors and seminarians. He went through many of the typical "John Piper" passages, outlining the truth that God acts for the purpose of self-glorification whenever He accomplishes anything. Such a doxological approach is helpful, but nothing in particular stood out to me as anything that was specifically memorable as far as giving me something new by way of a challenge in my constant masticating of the orthodoxy (why) and praxeology (how) of proper worship. However, the Q&A session combined with the question I asked Bob Kauflin afterwards provided help and enlightenment towards that end.

During the Q&A, Bob Kauflin addressed many practical problems that music directors may encounter in the life and span of their ministry. Because we were at Bethlehem Baptist Church, both Piper and Kauflin seemed to emphasize the "Gravity" part of worship rather than the "Gladness" part, as per the cultural emphasis in this particular body of believers. They discussed how to be a music pastor that wants to engender a culture of worship that carries a weightiness in the context of a preaching pastor that doesn't take anything seriously and makes jokes in between songs, subverting the spirit of "Gravity" that the music pastor is attempting to facilitate.

It was good that they addressed the issue, but that issue particularly wasn't helpful for me because of my personal background. I have been a part of churches where neither the preaching pastor nor the congregation seem to much of an idea about gladness, passion, or joy, but are stuck in a mindset that flows from a heart of unhealthy "Gravity" and a lack of any real enjoyment in God in response to the Gospel. This is the problem that I want to combat especially because I feel called to ministry in the spiritual wasteland of New England, and I may possibly come on staff somewhere in the capacity of some sort of pastor- this is an issue with which I want to know how to deal.

Because of that, I approached Bob after the Q&A and asked him what one should do in that situation. His advice was incredibly insightful; he said that it is not helpful or loving to approach such a pastor or pastoral team while harboring an attitude that attempts to fix every perceived problem. Kauflin communicated that as a rule, humility is the key to any of these kinds of interactions. First, the worship leader should do his best to learn everything he can from the preaching pastor; while the preaching pastor may truly have a lack of joy in the Lord, he may see other things clearly and it is essential to recognize where his thoughts are helpful rather than dismissing everything he has to say. Having a right spirit of loving humility, an approach that seeks to dialogue rather than question is the only way that one should think about such a dialogue. Nobody responds well to his or her modus operandi being arrogantly questioned, especially by a regarded inferior. As a whole, a culture must be developed where suggestions can be made without someone feeling attacked and others feeling as though they have come to fix all the problems in the church.

The issue that Piper and Kauflin answered in the Q&A was concerning the issue of how to integrate new and youthful worship styles in with those of the older generation. Because Bob has particular sway among many younger worship leaders, he said from the get-go that it is imperative to never think that someone can walk into a church and again, think that he or she can solve all the of the church's problems. Older people must be respected- not only because they are older, but because they actually are smarter than young people in many, many areas.

However, while this is very true, the energy and the passion that usually accompanies the youthful generation is also crucially important in the constant flux of reviving "retro" styles and incorporating new ones. Because Scripture never prescribes specifics in praxeology, change is a part of Church life that is needed to sustain the ebb and flow of culture and multi-generations. For this reason instituting new methods of operation is crucial to the growth and general life of the church. However, in a moment of cogency, Bob reaffirmed that as he grew in years, he began to realize why his predecessors did certain things the way that they did. What didn't make sense to him when he was younger made sense to him after years of experience, because they actually worked. He emphasized the point that there are things that older people do that are forged through the fires of adversity and conflict and should be learned from as such.

The bottom line to both of these addressed issues is humility, humility, humility. Whenever approaching any difference of method or even practical theology, it is essential to remember that we worship God who is One, His ways are higher than our ways, and we often know way less than we think we know. Then good things might begin to happen.

What do you love?

I love my guitar. To reference Brad Paisley, one's guitar will always be there for him in the best and the worst times. After hearing him make that statement, I dismissed it as some cute thing that a popular musician would say, but I didn't realize how true it is. I pictured selling my guitar or giving it away, and I'm sure there would be a part of me that would actually miss it though it's really not that nice at all. I love it so much because, especially as of late, my guitar (or music in general) has been one of the things that I most readily turn to when life gets hard.

I never thought that I would hear myself say this, but I think I have a deep emotional connection with an inanimate object.

Before I get too weird, here is why I bring that up: do I have a deep emotional connection to my personal copy of the Word of God? Have I used it enough to warrant such a relationship? Granted, I haven't had my current Bible nearly as long as I've had my guitar; but still, where do I go in the times of the most pain, anger, disappointment, bitterness, and all other intensely negative emotions? I would like to say that I go to the Bible. But quite honestly, the Bible isn't always the first place I run to when the walls of my security crumble around me.

Do you know what that means? I know what it DOESN'T mean- it doesn't mean that I need to buckle down and make sure I read the Bible more. It DOES mean that I have a hard, deceitful, and desperately wicked heart. It's SO DUMB to think that there is something else other than hearing the Voice of God that will somehow make my life better. That makes no sense at all. Satan is good at deceiving, and I'm good loving other things more than I love God.

I encourage you to look at the things in your life that you love the most, and actually be honest with yourself. Don't say, "This seems kind of spiritual, but without it I'd get really upset" and think that everything is ok. Ask God to show if His presence is found in the things that you love the most! If He's not, then we shouldn't put our time into those things!

I was just confronted today by someone that graciously shined the light of the Gospel in the deep recesses of my heart which wants to make ungodly justifications for satiating my emotions through means other than Jesus. It's really hard when we think we know what we want, and we really do love God (with a lot of our heart), but we know that there's just that one little bit that we don't want to give up.

Like my guitar, I want to have such a deep connection with Jesus that when the unhappy part of life happens, my default mode is to run to Him without thinking. Idealistic? Maybe.

All I can do is pray that Jesus changes mine and your heart to want Him more.

Psalm 34:9, "Oh, fear the LORD, you his saints, for those who fear him have no lack!"

.DSN.

Meditations From A Broken Spirit

I have seen everything that is done under the sun, and behold, all is vanity and a striving after wind – Ecclesiastes 1:14

I’m getting really sick and tired of this world. It seems like every time I invest time, money, energy, or anything that I have in something for the purpose of chasing which I perceive to be good apart from the love and grace of God, I undoubtedly will realize how much I have wasted in trying to accomplish that end.

For example, I went back home to New Hampshire this weekend, and it was incredible. I had a fantastic time catching up with old friends and leading God’s people in worship through music Friday and Saturday. After the festivities had run their course, I started to come to the realization that something was wrong. God was beginning to prick my heart deeply about how love a lot of things that are not God or the Gospel.

Coming to this realization has motivated me to go to the Psalms. I feel like there isn’t any one person that could give me the silver bullet to sort through all the conglomeration of mass that is my mind. While there are brothers that I trust with every detail of my life, I’m at the point where I realize that there comes a point when you can’t talk to anyone, except the only One that can actually do something about your problem. With counselors there is a multitude of safety, but with God there is a multitude of action.

That’s why I turned to the Psalms. David was a man who went through a lot worse stuff than I have and his prayers turned out to be breathed out by God Himself. Sure enough, they've easily been the most helpful.

One thought that kept smashing me over, and over, and over again was how little I actually believe the truth of the Gospel. Psalm 40:4 – “Blessed is the man who makes Yahweh his trust, who does not turn to the proud, to those who go astray after a lie!” Especially in the last few weeks, I feel like I have been chasing lies all the time. Primarily the lie that says that I can find something that will somehow make me more peaceful and satisfied in something other than God. As God has been peeling back the layers of my heart through different circumstances and relationships, I see that by chasing this kind of pseudo-satisfaction, I'm only revealing the muck that is in my heart. I show that I don’t love God more than that thing with which I’m trying to replace Him.

For the first time, Psalm 34:8-10 shouted to me in a way that I’ve never heard before, though I've heard it my whole life: “Oh, taste and see that the Lord is good! Blessed is the man who takes refuge in him! Oh, fear the Lord, you his saints, for those who fear him have no lack! The young lions suffer want and hunger; but those who seek the Lord lack no good thing.”

Did you see that?! Those that take refuge in Him lack no good thing! That means that when we actually seek God, not just pretend to be Christians but actually seek Him with our whole hearts, we will not lack any good thing! Not a single thing. There is nothing that is good for us that we will not have. All that we will have is all the good that we need.

I hope that is clear. When we actually taste the goodness of our God, we won’t want anything! When we see Jesus as better than everything, there is nothing that will seem even close to as valuable. That's why I believe Jesus can say that one must hate his mother and brothers. Compared to the unsurpassable love that we should have for God, our love for everything else may look like hatred to some.

Here’s the problem. Everyone is constantly battling unbelief of that radical truth. Especially me. I feel it today specifically. This weekend hasn’t created any problems, it has only exposed, yet again, more things that I take more seriously than God.

As it would follow, I read Psalm 36:5, and am torn to pieces. “Your steadfast love, O Lord, extends to the heaven, your faithfulness to the clouds.” Now you could probably buy a book that will teach seven ways to effectively love God more, but that stuff doesn't help me. I read a verse like that, and I wonder, if God’s love for me is so incredibly infinite and uncontainable, why in the universe would I not love Him more than stupid pettiness that I run after all the time? I can’t understand it (Jeremiah 17:9).

I’m very convinced that after being wrecked by the infinitude of God’s love in comparison to our gross and nasty offerings to him (or things we hide from Him), the only thing that can assuage our guilt is time in deep communion with God that leads to a better understanding of the imputed perfection of Christ on our behalf. This is a time where our ears must be open, mouths must be closed, and hearts must be penitent because He is all we need; He is our portion forever.

This kind of thing is not easy for me. I honestly believe that what I have just laid out is the origination of every sin that exists. I just can’t get that fact to go from jumbling around in my head to actually feeling it in my heart in a way that changes the way I act. It really isn’t easy.

I’m all about resting in Jesus, but I think I’m at the point where I need to actually do some fighting. The funny thing is that it’s not the same kind of fighting that I heard all growing up in the “do-sanctification-yourself” churches I grew up in. The kind of fighting I’m talking about is explicitly stated in Philippians 1:27: “Only let your manner of life be worthy of the gospel of Christ, so that whether I come and see you or am absent, I may hear of you that you are standing firm in one spirit, with one mind striving side by side for the faith of the gospel."

This is what I need to do- work hard to believe the Gospel and try to identify where God is working the Gospel out in my life and in the microcosmic situations in which I find myself; and when I still don’t believe, I need my knees to hit the ground, and pray. I don’t see any other possible solution.

To quote my Greek professor, "The only way to ultimately keep a child from taking candy from the candy jar is to give something that is better than the candy! The child will need more than a command to not want to take it."

Pretty nifty idea.

Bugs and Holiness

My living space here in Minneapolis is really “nice” (in the most Minnesotan sense of the word). I’m living on the third floor of of a house owned by a great family, and the quietness of the surrounding scenery affords a fantastic environment for the accomplishing of homework. I have a small kitchen, a sitting area, full bathroom, and a sizeable bedroom. The carpet is very comfortable, and I even have my own heating/cooling zone. I have everything I need, and for the most part, I have everything I could want.

There’s one problem.

I found a bug.

Bugs are gross.

I hate them. They are nasty and terribly unattractive. Words like “coarse", “vulgar", “repulsive", “abhorrent", “sickening", or “nauseating" are apropos, but quite honestly I’m scared of them.

I was slightly overcome with emotion when I saw this, disgusting brute. While created by our Sovereign God, I may be of the opinion that this kind of thing was not present before the Fall, but I refuse to go there right now.

To continue this riveting narrative, I picked up one of my sandals and slammed the ground fairly forcefully. He remained alive. His spindly legs assertively kicked at the air, making me even more uneasy. I vigorously slammed the ground four or five more times, finally incapacitating him enough to where he lay still, writhing ever so calmly. I was still so sickened by what lay before my eyes that I used a mass of toilet paper to act as a mediatory substance between my hand and the bug. I took one side of his body with the sandal and the other side with the toilet paper, and after multiple fails, I was finally able to flush him down the toilet.

Still shaking, I realized how truly repulsed by these creatures. I am so overcome with hatred at the sight of one little bug that I will go to extensive lengths in order to dispose of the thing without actually touching its body (ridiculous, I know).

The parallel that God impressed upon my heart was the similarity between my hatred for these bugs and His hatred for sin. Psalm 4:4 speaks to this- “For you are not a God who delights in wickedness; evil may not dwell with you.” Also in Proverbs, Solomon warns his son against things that are an ABomination to God: “Haughty eyes, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood, a heart that devises wicked plans, feet that make haste to run to evil, a false witness who breathes out lies, and one who sows discord among brothers.”

Here are a few synonyms for “abomination”: “atrocity, disgrace, horror, obscenity, and outrage.” God is not annoyed by sin. He despises it.

At this point, I've been convicted. While I am willing to potentially alter my entire evening because of a bug, I won’t steer clear of certain TV shows. I won’t go out of my way to avoid certain topics of conversation. I won’t concern myself too seriously with loving fellow man to the detriment of my personal comfort. (This next one really cuts deeply) All too often, I don’t guard myself against flirting or unthoughtfulness/selfishness in the area of my interactions with sisters in the faith. Ouch.

The bottom line is, I don’t take sin seriously enough.

I'm won't say that once I stop sinning and develop a hatred for all sin will I become more sanctified. If my goal is to merely sin less and distance myself from those that sin more, I've become no better than a Pharisee and I will literally lead people to hell (Matthew 23:15). However, a heart that truly loves God will hate sin. The closer we get to Jesus and the clearer we see His face, the more blurred and unattractive the pulls and desires of this world will become. God has pulled back a few layers of my heart in the last few days (especially today), and is in the process of showing me my callous nature that has turned a blind eye to many sinful attitudes that do not characterize the life of God-lovers.

The problem isn’t that I’m just sinning too much- that’s not what I mean at all! The real problem is that in the moments of pride, anger, or self-indulgence, I don’t love God more than I love sin. When I make selfish decisions, I'm only bringing to fruition the picture that I have of God in my head that isn’t big enough to overshadow my fleshly desire to sin more.

The more quickly and consistently that I lift my eyes to the hills to see Him from whom my help comes, the more that the fleeting pleasures of this world will grow so dim, insignificant, and worthless to me. That’s sanctification. Life is about seeing God more clearly in light of how hotly perfect He truly is, and seeing ourselves more clearly in light of how pitiful we really are.

God is so good to reveal any of these things to us. He could let us sit here on earth, live a meaningless life, and justifiably send us to hell. But He didn’t. He saved me. That’s why I love Him.

Sin is a bug. And I hate bugs. I want to hate sin. Too often I don't.

God is my only hope.

Deus Spes Nostra

The Gospel and Legalism, Part 3 – The Answer? More Gospel

"The glory of God". Great Christian phrase. It sounds really nice. It’s a great Sunday School answer. Better still, it makes great T-shirts. Problem is, it's strangely nebulous. It is easy to say that we should all live to glorify God, but what does that mean? The answer to that question has everything to do with the battle against legalism.

Someone that genuinely wants to glorify in everything he or she does will show the world that God's greatness really is better than anything else (the catch is that it’s hard to do that if it isn’t actually true in our lives). His name must be triumphed as that which satisfies the soul more deeply than anything- including intangible things, like the praise of man, personal success, or even ultra-spirituality. If God is for God, then He is not after my begrudging submission; He’s not after me just doing what He says so He won’t destroy me. If His goal is to praised, worshipped, and enjoyed, and in my enjoyment of Him, show Himself glorious not only to the world but to the universe itself, then He’s for my joy which means that all the commands of God in Scripture are not about taking anything from us but rather leading us into deeper joy than we can find anywhere else (Chandler). This solves the problem! As legalists, we should not run away from the commands of Scripture in order that we might find some other way to obtain joy, neither should we run to the commands of Scripture thinking that in following them we will find that joy. The imperatives of the Bible are placed to guide us in a way that shows God Almighty to be the most valuable; and in that showcase, we find the lasting joy, satisfaction, and fulfillment that we all yearn for!

God does not want unwilling obedience. The whole buckle-down-and-try-harder mentality (often wearing the mask of holiness) that is everywhere in the church not only isn't helpful, but it isn't godly at all. Why does God care about how "strong" we are when He is the one that sovereignly resuscitated us, bringing us from death to life? When this kind of Christian mantra is either implicitly or explicitly taught, God does not look most valuable when obedience from duty is way that Christians live the Christian life. Will any non-believer (or Christian kid for example) feel motivated to serve a God that demands impossibly taxing obedience as is laid out in Scripture? (“Be holy as He is holy,” to name one instance) This is why guilting people into obedience is a truly self-defeating endeavor! If there truly is a lack of obedience in someone’s heart, what does that show? It shows what is in the heart! The heart that loves Jesus and feels forgiven will by nature want to obey! How can it be any other way? This is the way we operate. The people that we choose to cheerfully serve are the people that we love and enjoy. The converse of this is also true, in that to those with whom we don’t like to spend time, it is a natural response to not love the idea of selfless service for them. When one feels downtrodden and that he or she is fighting a losing battle (performance-based sanctification), will demanding more obedience help that person? Not at all! Someone in such a state needs a total heart makeover that begins from the inside and works its way out.

This mind-blowing truth is made lucidly real in the account of Jesus’ interaction with the man with a demon in the Gerasenes in Luke 8:26-39. This man had somewhere from 3-6 thousand demons oppressing him, and the only way that the townspeople could contain him was by binding him by heaping chains and shackles on him. When Jesus saw the evil that was present in this man, what did He do? Did He pile more shackles and chains onto him in order to control him? Jesus did the opposite! By His divine power, he took off the chains and freed the man from his bondage, making him a man clothed and in his right mind. If that is not the empowering work of Good News in a man’s life, I don’t know what is.

Paul’s interaction with Peter is also a very helpful paradigm in seeing the importance of walking in the Gospel as the motivation for the Christian life rather than some outwardly obligation. When Peter acted in fear of the Jews (Galatians 2), what did Paul do? He could have taken Peter to Leviticus or some passage/saying of Jesus that could have convicted Peter of his man pleasing, but he didn’t. Galatians 2:14 states Paul’s motivation for taking issue with Peter’s actions. Paul says, “But when I saw that their conduct was not in step with the truth of the Gospel, I said to Cephas before them all, ‘If you, though a Jew, live like a Gentile and not like a Jew, how can you force the gentiles to live like Jews?’” Paul did not shy away from confronting sin, but it was the spirit in which he did it that makes this story remarkable. If Paul’s primary concern was that Peter act like a good Christ-follower and not soil the name of “Christian” or that he should first “uphold his testimony” he would have slammed Peter as hard as he could in an attempt to convict Peter to change his ways. However, Paul saw that the problem with Peter’s sin was that he wasn’t walking according to the indicatives of the Gospel! What a freeing thing! When we confront sin in our own lives and in others’ lives, we do not address offenses that first are an affront to own solidarity, but we address a spirit that has fundamentally missed the point of the Good News that proclaims our positional approval from God on account of Christ. We don’t need to put up a façade or strenuously work on our goodness, because Jesus’ sacrifice on our behalf frees from pleasing man as Peter was trying to do. We can do what we know is right at all times because we know that God sees Jesus covering our sin, rendering all other outside praise/condemnation completely useless. There is no place in the body of Christ for either guilt-trips or self-motivation to attain this nebulous spirituality. It seems that the most spiritual people are the ones that don’t care about becoming more spiritual (Tchividjian). The men and women that grasp the point that life is not about their betterment or “sanctification” but about making the name of Christ known to everyone are the people that are further along in their journey of sanctification because they are looking to Jesus, the Author and Perfector of the faith (Hebrews 12:2). These are men and women who lift their eyes to the hills, for they see that Zion is the place from there that their help comes (Psalm 121:1-2). That glorifies God.

The Gospel is the cure for legalism. When we believe the Gospel, we affirm that Jesus alone can save us from the desires of the flesh (sin). We believe that if the good things in our lives (Bible knowledge, spiritual leadership, discipline, encouragement) are made out to be gods, Yahweh is not glorified and we are not satisfied. The goal is to understand the truth of Romans 8:1-4 and feel the helplessness with which every human lives every day. We need to give honor, glory, praise, and admiration to the One who has done what we try to do every day by denying the power of the Good News and attempting to live a life of self-completion.

“There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. For the law of the Spirit of life has set you free in Christ Jesus from the law of sin and death. For God has done what the law, weakened by the flesh, could not do. By sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh and for sin, he condemned sin in the flesh, in order that the righteous requirement of the law might be fulfilled in us, who walk not according to the flesh but according to the Spirit.”

Praise the Lord

Deus Spes Nostra

For Part 1 on my presentation of the Gospel, click here!

For Part 2 on my presentation of Legalism, click here!

Maturing into Manhood 2.0 - Treasuring Singleness

I don’t have roommates. I would not unhesitatingly recommend it to everyone, but so far, God has given me abundant and specific grace to avoid certain sin patterns that without Him, I would so easily fall. Because of this period of extended social silence, I have been compelled to ask Him to bring certain attitudes and behaviors to the surface that I may be too busy to see otherwise. One of those things is personal discipline; through some mentoring, the patriarch of the family with which I live has been able to give me some helpful suggestions to become more self-controlled in basic life functions, such as eating, sleeping, and spiritual discipline.

As I have enjoyed getting up with enough time to prepare for the day without flying by the seat of my pants, I have been working through the book of 1 Corinthians at a slower, more deliberate pace. Through this study, God hit me with a ton of metaphysical bricks when I read chapter 7, verses 25-35. Paul is admonishing his brothers and sisters concerning marriage. Here are some excerpts.

“…I give my judgment as one who by the Lord’s mercy is trustworthy…Are you free from a wife? Do not seek a wife…Those who marry will have worldly troubles, and I would spare you that…[Let] those who deal with the world as though they had no dealings with it. For the present form of this world is passing away. I want you to be free from anxieties. The unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord. But the married man is anxious about worldly things, how to please his wife.”

If I could rank the top three most dismissed Scripture passages in the world today, this would either win or come in close second. I, and I assume many others, have read this passage and dismissed it based on Paul’s admission that it is his personal wisdom (v25), or simply dismissed it because it’s ridiculous and seems really dumb.

God used this ice pick passage to smash me in the face. In nowise can I say that I am “anxious for the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord.” If anything, I focus more of my time and energy looking for potential relationships than caring about how to please the Lord (there is no possible way you haven’t done the same thing. I know. Trust me). Paul assumes that single people are anxious for the things of the Lord and that we as “singles” use our singleness to serve and give to others in ways that married couples cannot.

This is my conviction concerning the single people out there, namely the men. We are wasting our lives. It is rare to find a young Christian single person that cares little for this world and intensely loves doing the Lord’s work and serving the body in ways that only single people can. The prevailing attitude that I observe, starting with personal introspection, is that single people everywhere so badly want the approval of the opposite sex that we will more often than not go to ridiculous ends to get that approval. Even if we do get what we “want”, it is not the securing of our relationship with Jesus, so there is always more to be had, continuing down the endless cycle of months, even years of wasted time trying to medicate the pain that only Jesus can heal.

I say all of that to say this: as single people, we need to press hard for the things of the Lord. Again, trying to “become more godly” is only a self-centered, self-defeating goal (again, great blog fodder). What has helped me in the last week has been the seeing of my inadequacy as a single person who is not anxious for the Lord’s work, and laying that inadequacy at the feet of Jesus.

Men: We must change the culture. We absolutely cannot continue to approach every relationship with young ladies as opportunities for a potential mates. It is of the highest importance that we see each and every young woman as someone to whom we need to minister the Gospel. Will this relationships look different than our relationships with other men? Absolutely. But the approach that I am putting forth is a far cry from the average guy/girl interaction. You may respond, “Dave, you are ridiculous for saying that every time we see a girl we need to impart spiritual wisdom or something to them. Nobody likes that, and where’s the harm in having fun?” To that I would mostly agree. Ministering the Gospel does not mean a thorough exposition on 1 Corinthians 15 every time people hang out, but understanding that everyone needs the Gospel means that nobody, in an ultimate sense, either needs affirmation from others or should be looked to for the purpose receiving affirmation/completion/fulfillment. Girls and guys should honestly be able to spend time together playing music, sports, talking about intellectual stuff, or even shooting the breeze. I’m concerned with the motivation. Are we doing all that fun stuff because we are either looking for attention/a girlfriend/wife? Or are we having fun because we are enjoying the bond we have in Christ and have that kind of security that is not available outside the church?

In the end, we need to treasure singleness. There are so many opportunities that we as singles have that married couples don’t have, because their primary goal (or should be, anyways) to work on their relationship. To quote a good newlywed friend of mine, “When you get married, you lose a good part of your free time.” This is my point. The free time that we as single people have should not be squandered watching worthless wastes of time on the computer/TV or spending inordinate amounts of time doing positive things like working out for two hours a day. I strongly suggest that if you are single or even in a dating relationship where marriage is not right around the corner (and even if it is), seek God about this. Ask Him to put things into your life to help you selflessly help others and grow in ways that you may not have as much time to work for in the pursuit of marriage.

I will most likely follow this up again with another post, but this is all I got for now.

ALWAYS remember that God Alone is Our Hope! Nobody else can give you any lasting feeling of hope/joy/fulfillment/satisfaction whatsoever!

Deus Spes Nostra

The Gospel and Legalism, Part 2 – Legalism: Jesus Isn't Enough

le-gal-ism - |ˈlēgəˌlizəm| (noun) - Legalism is the state of mind found present when any person seeks satisfaction by appealing to some standard other than the person and work of Jesus Christ as proclaimed through the Gospel. (My definition)

I will explain. When “Legal” (that which pertains to the law) and “ism” (a distinctive practice, system, or philosophy) are combined, the result is a system of practice that is law-centric. This mentality produces a practical methodology with two extremes: moralism and hedonism. The moralist says, “I find satisfaction, self-worth, importance, and ground by which to judge myself and others through obedience of a collection of Biblical directives. Obeying commands and buckling down hard to attain godliness is the only thing that will make me truly happy.” This mindset is difficult to diagnose because on the surface the person that works this way may actually look very spiritual. They may go to church, take pride in their academics or occupation, they may be polite to strangers, and they may even seem to be altruistic in service and ministry. These people may be passionate about the Bible. They might perhaps study it outside of their time of personal devotions. Of course, most legalists will not try to pretend that they keep all the rules- nobody can do that, but they are good people. They don’t cheat on tests or taxes, they don’t steal money or withhold from tithing, and they are very skillful at identifying those that do. Not only do they keep many of these noticeable rules, they stay far away from things and/or people that may influence them to fall into such transgression. For the moralist, victory is found by picking oneself up by the bootstraps and defeating sin: illicit sexuality, anger, depression, impatience, or anything that that once was and now is no more through the solidarity of human willpower. Conversely, defeat is any time anyone commits any kind of sin; because Moral Legalism is driven by spiritual performance, it is quite common to find that repeated defeat in one particular sin area goes hand-in-hand with depression and an overwhelming sense of self-defeatedness.

This is one reason why so many Christian parents may be surprised when their kids enter college and leave the church. They may comport to the Christian standard, but that appearance could not be further from the truth. They honor God with their lips but their heart is far from Him. The parents may say that their son or daughter was such a wonderful child, but in reality, the child was only good at obeying but saw no peace or joy by living a life based on conditionality. When given the opportunity, the child will run. It’s not shocking. Obedience to Christian mores in order to obtain favor with God and others is not empowering and certainly not good news; it’s not obedience in response to the favor that Jesus won for us through His death on the cross and resurrection from the dead (doing for God what we could never do). This is diametrically opposed to the faith in the good news of the Gospel. The Gospel says that pleasing obedience to God is only made possible after God has chosen to show favor to us; the Gospel does not say that in order to obtain favor from God we must obey the things He says. In short, the attitude of the Moral Legalist is, “My acceptance to God/others and my own self-approval rely on how well I obey the directives of Scripture and how well I can keep myself clean from the world’s influence. I have been justified by Jesus on the cross, but now I need to work as hard as I can to constantly secure God’s favor.”

Please hear me.

This will utterly destroy the church.

The heart that thinks God’s evaluation is based on us is not only incredibly arrogant, but discounts the work of God as the one who affects change in our hearts. It is arrogant to think that in our depraved, fleshly state, we can somehow please God by any number of “good” things to do. Remember that to God our righteousness is menstruous rags (Isaiah 64:6). Apart from the Spirit developing love for God in our hearts, why would He care if we are outwardly pristine? The promulgation of such an attitude will produce an abundance of self-righteous people (if they actually succeed in this endeavor) and there will be a gaping hole where undeserved grace needs to come and save. If we keep the entire law but do not love God, He neither cares nor is glorified in our lives. Keep in mind that if you do truly love God you will keep His commands (John 14:15), but you can’t work backwards! Just because you obey laws does not mean you love the One that gave them!

The hedonist is the other side to the coin of Legalism. Strangely enough, the hedonist is much closer to the moralist than meets the eye. The hedonist says, “I will find my happiness and satisfaction through ridding myself of all the laws from my parents, the government, and most importantly, God. I will seek for soul-satisfaction in the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and my pride in the level of success I achieve in life.”

While both mentalities search for affirmation and satisfaction through opposite means, the end is exactly the same. Hedonists and Moralists have ultimate standards of satisfaction- the standard that reads, “Jesus is not enough.” The problem with Legalism is that its promise of happiness never fulfills because what it promises doesn’t exist! There will always be more to do (either keeping/breaking more rules) because nothing can infinitely satisfy apart from the reality of the Christ’s message on the cross: “I am enough, it is finished. Look no further. Everything you need, I have.”

If you have been born in human flesh, you are a Legalist. If you ever think that God is not enough for your peace joy and therefore begin to look to other things (even spiritual things) as the means to achieve such functional salvation, then you begin to appeal and work towards some standard other than the righteousness of the Christ that God sees when He looks at you if you have believed.

You might know you’re a Legalist if…

1. You believe that “God helps those who helps themselves”
   
2. You become depressed because your walk is not where it “should be” (whatever that means)
   
3. You communicate to others that your love for them is dependant on something they do either for you or for God
   
4. You believe that God’s love of you is dependant on what you do for him
   
5. You enjoy sermons with titles similar to “3 Ways To Defeat Lust” or “The 5 Biblical Principles of Friendship”
   
6. You believe that God’s approval of you depends on whether or not you looked at porn (or sin ‘x’) in the last “x” amount of days/weeks/months/years
   
7. You believe that you will find meaning in life by gaining the approval of others
   
8. You believe that while God is ‘good’ and it is ‘good’ to read the Bible and pray, having fun and doing what you feel like is ultimately the way to find happiness
   
9. You identify godly people by the amount of sinning they do or don’t do
   
10. The way to become godly and pursue holiness is by trying your hardest to follow as many imperatives as possible
    

This is hard stuff. I know that my characterization of Legalism may not be as full as it could/should be, but I am wrestling daily through this myself. While my knowledge is partial, I am confident that these are foundationally reliable categories that are very helpful in better understanding our human condition for the purpose of growing in grace. Please comment on the blog if something needs clarification and I will change whatever needs to be clarified! Next time, I get to do my best to encourage on how pursuit of the Gospel utterly obliterates any “God isn’t enough” attitude- it’s going to be fun! I hope you think through these things with me and I would love if you would post in the comments below; and if you agree, disagree, or would just like to write something, I’ll read it and respond if I can! Remember, God ALONE is our hope!

Deus Spes Nostra

For Part One on my presentation of the Gospel, click here!

For Part Three on the solution to Legalism, click here!

The Gospel and Legalism, Part 1 – The Gospel: How He Loves!

I want to be a pastor. Whether that’s a preacher, music minister, elder, or teacher, I feel the call. The problem is that I’ve also felt for a long time that I don’t have a specific passion for anything. I feel kind of like I’m in a boat with the motor at full speed; but after having island-hopped all over the ministry archipelago, I end up dry and unmotivated to pursue anything with fervor. This continuous feeling of hopelessness was just what God used to reveal His strength by exploiting my weakness. He gave me a passion that I would have never found on my own- a passion more life-changing and worldview-transforming that I can't think of many other things worth much time in my life. That passion is the Gospel.

Speaking of the Gospel, here is the song that is going through my headphones right now-
“He is jealous for me. He loves like a hurricane; I am a tree, bending beneath the weight of his wind and mercy. When all of a sudden I am aware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory- and I realize how beautiful You are and how great Your affections are for me. Oh! How He loves us! Oh! How He loves us! How He loves us!”

These are the meditations of a heart, mind, and soul that have been completely gripped and helplessly enraptured with hope, love, and acceptance that only God through the Gospel can provide. You might ask, “How do these lyrics, specifically, reveal a Gospel-saturated heart?” The answer is fairly simple. To clearly communicate that answer however, I want to tell a historical-redemptive version of the Gospel, just so you and I are on the same page.

The Gospel begins with God’s perfect creation: no death, disease, torment, or pain. God was so pleased with what He had made that He walked and spent time with this creation every day. Then, His creation decided to believe a lie. It was a simple lie. Believe it or not, it’s the same lie that we all believe whenever we sin. This is the lie that God is not good enough, wise enough, or strong enough to satisfy our deepest longings more than thing “x” with which we decide to replace God (disbelief in the Gospel). So having believed this lie and having disbelieved the promise of God, imperfection (sin) was introduced into God’s previously perfect world. Because God’s perfection burns too hot for any imperfection to even stand near his presence, this creates quite a problem, because all of humanity is imperfect. For indelibly stained humanity to have any chance at reconciliation with God, something very otherworldly needed to bear the consequence that our imperfection deserved. Although it took over a couple thousand years, Jesus- God wrapped up in human skin- came to earth to live a life that was impossible for any other being to live. Not a spot of imperfection was found in Him. He gave up a glorious life of wealth, fame, and popularity, and underwent intense torture, slander, mockery, and abandonment. And finally, (while I don’t know how this is possible) His Father placed the sins of His people on His shoulders to bear the consequence as He prepared for and finally died, nailed to a tree. It was at this point that He experienced what every single person that has ever lived truly deserves; He was separated from His Father, Yahweh, the Great I AM, in what must be the worst anguish possible. I can’t imagine having my father turn His back on me in an act of disapproval after living with him and knowing him and laughing with him for 19 years. Multiplying that times infinity to a Father and Son that have been together since eternity past then being separated like this for the first time ever is too mind-blowing for me to even consider. So Jesus has now died and has been in a grave for three days; He is quite dead at this point- there’s no mistaking that. Then just as things began to get really hopeless, there was a giant earthquake, and Jesus stormed out of the grave, rolling away an enormous boulder, without any opposition at all! He did it! Completely through His own power, He thoroughly defeated any power that sin and death previously held. The good news is complete! This is the Gospel! Jesus died and then was raised from death so that we could believe in this death-conquering power and be utterly transformed by this message. It is tremendously important to remember that Jesus did not owe it to ANYONE to condescend to our level, to die, or to be raised again. He did it because to Him, it was worth it. He loves His people.

This is where I find myself very passionate- the Gospel does NOT BY ANY MEANS stop at salvation! The Gospel of grace (we don’t deserve any of this sacrifice, it’s all totally undeserved) applies EQUALLY as much to our growth as Christians as it did for our salvation. At salvation, we must recognize that there is nothing we can do to get ourselves to God; and during Christian growth (or for the Bible junkies, sanctification), that fact remains just as meaningful before salvation as it does after salvation. Paul says in Galatians 3, “Having begun by the Spirit, are you being perfected by the flesh?” I've heard some preachers talk about how we need to clean up our act and stop doing all sins (which is factual) with no mention of the fact that we can do NOTHING in our own strength to eradicate sin. They’re missing the point. Sin is a symptom of a heart that doesn't think that Jesus is better! When one believes that being a good Christian means being satisfied with ANYTHING other that Jesus’ conquering of sin and death on the cross (including living a “pure life”), such a person has failed to believe the Gospel. According to Romans 5, God looks at us seeing either the righteousness of Jesus (in the regenerate) or he sees the filth of our humanness (in the unregenerate). When we are regenerate, He sees Christ’s perfect work covering us; not the good things that we want to do or the bad things that we don’t want to do. He loves us all the time! This is why Jesus sums up the Law and the Prophets thusly, "Love God, and love people." A deep-seated understanding of how loving and forgiving God has been to us should free us from trying to be “good people.” There is no such thing as a “good person.” Only God is good, and by His grace He loves us in spite of our imperfections or lack of goodness (which incidentally Christ still covers).

Now, someone may say, “Should we continue in sin that grace may abound?” I would respond, “Not at all! How can someone who deeply feels the love of God and the undeserved grace of the Gospel want to go out and offend the God that gave everything to us when we had absolutely nothing to give to Him?" The two ideas are diametrically opposed.

This is why “How He Loves” is the meditation of someone who loves the Gospel of grace. Grace begets grace- when one truly feels grace, he ALWAYS turns and passes it to another. Dillon Chase added a few lyrics to accentuate this message of how helpless we are and how much God loves us in spite of our helplessness and even direct rebellion against God:

“You have sought me while I kept on running, fingertips stripped away, chains I was hugging. I willfully spit in your face with my lips, You wiped it off and let your blood drip. Oh, how He loves us so!”

I’m choking up now as I listen to this song again- WHY DON’T WE HEAR ABOUT HOW MUCH GOD LOVES US??? I’ve heard so many sermons on why we need to preach the wrath of God and do not want to be just a church that “loves” everyone to the detriment of orthodoxy, and to that I say yes and amen- but part of the glory of the wrath of God is that Jesus already bore that wrath for His people! For those who believe the Gospel, THERE IS NO WRATH ANYMORE! PRAISE OUR AMAZING GOD WHO GIVES GRACE ALL DAY, EVERY DAY!

So that’s the Gospel. Jesus did what we could never do, because He loved us for nothing we could ever do, and He grows us in spite of everything we try to do in our efforts to find peace and satisfaction in some place other than in Him.

“We are His portion, and He is our prize, drawn to redemption by the grace in His eyes. If His grace is an ocean, we’re all sinking! And heaven meets earth like a sloppy-wet kiss and my heart turns violently inside of my chest. I don’t have time to maintain these regrets when I think about the way that He loves us! Oh how He loves us! Oh how he loves us! Oh how He loves!”

The Gospel says that God alone is our hope.

Deus Spes Nostra.

For Part Two on my presentation of Legalism, click here!

The Gospel and Legalism - Introduction (Read First)

If you've been following my FaceBook or Twitter status updates, you may notice that I've been thinking a lot lately about the Gospel. This preoccupation with the Good News has been encouraged by listening to Tullian Tchividjian, the preaching pastor at Coral Ridge Presbyterian Church in Fort Lauderdale, Florida. Through this transformation of beginning to see everything in life through the lens of the Gospel, I've realized how Legalism is not just a category of people that have a lot of rules or perhaps stress personal holiness (which is not bad)- Legalism is the natural state of every person everywhere, regardless of theological bent or denominational upbringing.

I write this introduction knowing that some may disagree with what I say for various reasons. For the purpose of promoting one-mindedness (and my desire to not be misunderstood), I would like to mitigate those reasons to the best of my ability for the furtherance of the Gospel and the ministry of grace. To accomplish such an end, I plan on carefully defining, or redefining, these key terms of "Gospel" and "Legalism" and work with said definitions for the clarity of those who read and for my own lucidity of thought.

Lastly, while I will do my very best to make these posts readable on their own merit, I ask that this set of posts specifically be read in order of parts (Part 1, 2, then 3), because I want to build my case from the ground, up. My plan of attack is as follows-

Part 1 - Explain the Gospel and how the Gospel is not synonymous with evangelism
Part 2 - Explain Legalism and dispel the myth that only a small sect of rule-keepers are Legalists
Part 3 - Explain how the Gospel works to solve the problem of Legalism through the Unconditional Grace of God

I hope that these posts will be a blessing, and that my attitude and tone will only promote the building of the body of Christ. Each one of these posts has been, is, and will be bathed in prayer and input from many spiritual leaders far more godly than I am- and in some cases, I may just parrot phrases/ideas not original to me at all (not like I've ever done it in the past either...) :)

God Is Our Hope

The Bible And Bad Language

What follows is an excerpt from a very dear friend to whom I did my best to explain the view that I believe that God communicates to us from His word. As always, please leave a comment and let me know how you think I represented the view from the Scriptures. If you do want to comment, please do read my whole post, just so you do not get an idea from what I said that is not what I am trying to write. Thanks! I hope this helps to at least get the wheels turning in your mind, if nothing else.

-----------------------

I know that what I will say will probably (hopefully) spur further conversation concerning this topic, but I will similarly risk your not liking me or thinking less of me in some way and let you know what I've been thinking.

I've thought A LOT about the whole issue of language and what is appropriate and inappropriate and I have come to some conclusions, and some other non-conclusions as you will see

My first conclusion was in the form of just questioning what I've always grown up being taught by simply asking, "Why?" Not necessarily in a rebellious "I don't want to obey" type of attitude, but just asking, "Why do we have such stringent rules the way we do?" I thought to myself that if one is to own such standards/rules/guidelines, or even more strongly perhaps, an moral injunction, one should be able to support such rules with clear Scriptural support, not just a few misapplied verses.

Having asked the "Why?" question, I began to get feedback. Many people said that the Bible clearly speaks against "cursing", "swearing", and using "filthy/corrupt language."

Looking at cursing for instance, the Bible speaks of cursing as cursing another person, not as we would say that someone "cursed someone out." That kind of application isn't used in the Bible. Cursing is more like speaking beguilements towards someone or something, such as the kind of mockery Jesus endured on the cross as he had many men speak curses to him, wishing ill and harm to him as he was on trial and hanging being slapped and asked to prophesy. You know the story. Also, a few more examples of cursing are things like Job cursing the day he was born, or when King Balak asks Balaam to curse Israel. It seems ridiculous that the king would ask Balaam to just utter a "curse word" against Israel, but actually to prophesy evil upon them. A modern example would be saying "D- you" out of anger towards another person. Those are the kinds of things against which the Bible directly speaks.

Swearing seems even more straightforward than cursing. When the Bible speaks of swearing, as in Matthew 5, Jesus says, “Again you have heard that it was said to those of old, ‘You shall not swear falsely, but shall perform to the Lord what you have sworn.’ But I say to you, Do not take an oath at all by heaven, for it is the throne of God... Let what you say be simply ‘Yes’ or ‘No’; anything more than this comes from evil." Jesus equates swearing with oath-making. There should be no need to say "I swear on my mother's life that I didn't take the cookie." Our word should be so trustworthy that we are taken to sincerely mean what we say.

We could do word studies on these word usages, as many have done- and compile a laundry list of places in which both words have been used, but in none of the cases I have found have I seen either of those words mean anything other than the things that I mentioned.

This discussion gets interesting when the third reason given against using "sinful words" is brought up, and the most clear passage cited is Ephesians 4:25ff. Paul makes a list of things in the format of "Don't do this, but instead do this, the reason being... (and applies an aspect of the Gospel to each particular instance)." Specifically, we're looking at verse 29, "Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear." The issue here hinges on the definition of "corrupting talk." I won't make up some Greek word that supports my argument, because frankly, I don't know Greek . However, we can get an idea of what Paul means by seeing the positive speech qualities with which he contrasts "corrupting talk." He says that things that should be uttered should not be corrupting, but are things that are 1) useful for building up, 2) fitting for the occasion, and 3) used to give grace to the hearer.

It may seem like an open and shut case on the side of never using any kind of "bad words" at all, but I ask that you look at the broader context of the way that Paul talks. First, building others up does not mean that we are supposed to make everyone feel nice and warm inside. If that were true, then Jesus sinned all the time. His purpose was to use the means necessary to (sometimes in a jarring way) proclaim truth. Paul says in Ephesians 4:15 that we are to grow up into the head (of the body of the church) which is Christ. That is our motive- we need to do whatever we can to help people understand truth, so that they will see God in a clearer way in order to help someone in their process of sanctification. So things that build up may be something like, "The Spirit was moving through your message today, pastor", but may also be some a variation of "You need to get your head where it needs to be and see what's actually going on here in 'x' situation." Both are things that will hopefully build up a brother/sister- one nicely, the other more harshly.

For a word to be fitting for the occasion, it may similarly be an expression of blessing to a minister, or a warning to a straying brother or sister who may be harmfully affecting himself and/or others.

Ultimately, God-centered words are meant to give grace to the hearer. I think it's interesting that God does not define unwholesome talk by way of a vocabulary list. He could have done that. The reason I think He chose not to do such a thing is because rather than denigrating the battle for words by making about a list of "do's" and "don'ts", He makes it a matter of intention.

There are certain words that are condemning and judgmental, the foremost of this category being the "G-D" word. This word explicitly invokes the name of God to curse something that we have ABSOLUTELY no power to curse. It's the same thing to say D- You to any person for the purpose of wishing harm upon them.

There are also words that have very inappropriate sexual meanings that I would never want to say them because in saying them, they bring up sexual thoughts that should not be thought of at any time, regardless of the person.

Then there are words that are not sexual or condemnatory, but fall into the category of social politeness- words for excrement being among these. As an example, we wouldn't talk about the details of cleaning up after the dog during Thanksgiving dinner. God considers the heart of the words said (intention) more important than parsing out the uses of culturally defined words (vocabulary list).

Looking at Jesus, He always went right to the core of the matter- He never said, "You need to do x, y, and z to be one of my good disciples." He said that the summary of the WHOLE LAW was to love God with all of your heart and your neighbor as you would yourself. If we love God with our whole hearts, then the things that we say and do will directly follow from that heart (Matthew 15:18). That's why I don't see a problem using a euphemism to make a certain point about something I see as important. In this case, it really bothers me when people are under the delusion that real men are not allowed to cry. I used the phrase that I did because I honestly didn't see a problem with using it. I wasn't thinking, "Aha! Here's a way to toe the line of sin and still be not be sinning!"

While slightly unrelated to this specific instance, I also see just as much of a problem saying something like "Dang it" as I would saying "Oh snap" when something doesn't go the way it was supposed to- because someone that says "Dang it" isn't using that phrase in a way to inappropriately condemn something, but is saying something out of frustration. The intent is just the same as when someone says "Snap" or "Oh come on."

If there is a way that I can build someone up (by possibly using shock value as a way to get someone's attention) using language that isn't a part of my everyday vocabulary, I can't see in Scripture (either inductively or deductively) the conclusion that certain words are inherently worse than others.

However, I BY NO MEANS want anyone to think that I go around using base language all day, because I don't. I'm just convinced that while we need to consider the appropriateness of our speech, God holds our hearts accountable; and if we are trying and seeking God's enabling us to be mini-grace-dispensers (whether the form of grace be a pez candy or a hard pill to swallow) then I don't see what else God will judge us for.

If you're here that means that you've (hopefully) read my little epic on what I think the Bible says about speech , and I really hope that you don't just write it all off because it's different than what you and I have grown up hearing, but that you would think through my points, and let me know if you have objections to either the methods or the conclusions that I have in anything regarding this topic.

I love ya bro, and I'm really glad that we're friends

David